Author: Swati Mohandas
“You are dumb. Your parents didn’t teach you anything. You are good for nothing.” I was subjected to such kind of verbal abuse now and then. Sometimes, I even had to tolerate physical abuse. But I kept quiet. I was reluctant to report abuse at the hands of my wife.
Yes, you read it right! I am Raghav and I am abused by Anita, my wife from the last 5 years.
Ours is a love marriage and I was aware of her temper, however after we got married her tantrums only got worse. We had our child within the first year of our marriage. Once while I was at work, she called me and said that she is going to kill our child and hung up the call. I frantically rushed home to see our baby sleeping and she was watching TV.
Upon asking why she said such a thing on the call she simply said that she was ‘frustrated‘ with the routine.
Even if I was late by 30 minutes she would ask, ‘who is the b***h you are having an affair with?’ She would check my phone call records and messages and constantly threaten me of divorce.
There were no healthy arguments or disagreements, there was only her way. We still managed to meet a counsellor but she declared that she was rehabilitated and refused to attend any sessions. My thoughts or suggestions were met with ridicule and mockery.
I was criticized for not showing enough affection and yet I was turned down if I tried to do so. I was ridiculed for my dressing sense, eating habits even my choice of movies. Her response to anything I would do was returned with insults, yelling, throwing things at me and vehemently arguing with me.
To maintain my sanity, I began therapy. I began to realize that I had been trying to ‘save’ my marriage whereas she had no desire to change. She was satisfied, as long as I compiled with her tantrums.
I couldn’t take it anymore. I was done with her angry tirade. Finally, I decided to file a harassment case on her and also for the custody of our only child.
In our country, there is no strong support system for men, as much as there is for women. You will hardly find any organizations who deals with injustice towards men. Even if the path ahead is full of struggle I would still go ahead with the case against my wife.
Note to the readers : This is a fictional tale of Raghav’s journey from darkness to light. However, husband abuse at the hands of his wife does exist. To avoid the loss of ‘manly’status in society, many men choose to continue to suffer. Due to societal expectations of men to be strong, it is almost impossible for a man to see himself as a victim of abuse.
About the Author:
I am a Philosophy graduate and a certified computer professional from Mumbai and based in Pune with my family from the last 2 decades.
Literature always fancied me. I pen down short stories, blogs, poems and has forayed into freelance content writing. I even published an award-winning book of collected poems titled ‘Myriad Whispers’ which is available on Amazon.
When not writing, I enjoy listening to music, exploring the outdoors and scanning local bookstores.